December 2016: Tune into Your Inner Knowing

December coaxes us to go deep within, connect to our intuition, and trust and follow its guidance. We're reminded that all of the answers we need already lie within us. Sensitivity and emotions continue to be heightened all month long; extra diligence in our spiritual practice (particularly meditation and prayer) will be required. We're going to need to be extra gentle and patient with ourselves. 

The need for rest and retreat that was felt in the later half of November carries over well into this month, and is particularly strong in the first half. But the overall themes of reflection and contemplation will be with us all month long. Keep your eyes on the long-term prize—this is a time for preparation, laying the groundwork, and making feasible plans towards our ultimate, long-term goals and dreams. The task we're being asked to step up to is no simple one—to align our minds, hearts and actions with our inner truth.

Watch out for attachment issues that may flare up this month. Whether it's the impulse to control everything, or the tendency to become overly wrapped up in the concerns of the material world, the solution is to turn within. This month will not let us get away with seeking anything outside us to fulfill us. 

Regardless of whatever challenges or uncertainties we may face, we are urged to not get caught in worry and fear. We are reassured that we are taken care of and can trust in the universe. Some new information or revelations will arrive in the second half of the month—whether this news is of a positive or negative nature, the importance of choosing trust over fear cannot be overstated. The potential for inner healing is tremendous this month, so make the most if it! 

All that we seek is already within us. 

A Reading About the 2016 US Election

Many of us are concerned and fearful about the results of the US presidential election. I know that I, personally, have been struggling with fear quite a bit over the last few weeks. But I still have deep faith that humanity’s transition into the new age of Aquarius is both inevitable and well underway. I truly believe that we are shifting from a patriarchal, hierarchical, conquesting, and brutally competitive age into a more egalitarian, harmonious and cooperative age; from separation consciousness into unity consciousness. But the thousands-year-old patriarchy isn’t going to tumble into the dustbin of history quietly….and perhaps not even peacefully. I view the election results as an embodiment of this; an angry backlash of the old, dying way—its last (or one of its last) hoorah(s). 

But that doesn’t mean we should just sit back, check out, or stick our heads in the sand. If we ever want to catch a glimpse of the new age we yearn for in our lifetime, we must be active participants in ushering it in. The damage that this reactionary backlash will cause remains to be seen, but the responsibility for minimizing and mitigating that damage is ours. As one of my absolute favorite astrologers, Kaypacha Lescher, so aptly put it:

“We could have entered and ushered in a new paradigm easily, gracefully, slowly, gently, dismantling the old…(but) we have decided, collectively, to bring it on like a tidal wave. Wipe out the old paradigm and start over again from scratch. This is more traumatic. For some people, it may be more exciting. It’s more revolutionary, it’s more rebellious.”

In hopes to bring peace and empowerment to myself and anyone who might read this, I decided to do a special oracle card/intuitive reading about how we, as a collective, can navigate these especially uncertain times.

Here is the overall message I received—I hope it will be as comforting and empowering to you as it was for me:

First and foremost: we were made for times such as these. We are lightworkers and it's time for us to wake up, step up and shine our light. While our fear and anger ARE valid and must be honored, we cannot let our fear and anger drive us. We must stand firmly for what we believe in and stand up for those whose rights are at stake, doing so from a place of love. We must go more deeply into our spiritual practice than ever before. 

Embrace your power; we're here to transform the world, not to disengage from it. We CAN be spiritual AND informed, passionate activists at the same time. And these times will require nothing less from us.

Remember that we are here to help heal this world and usher in a new age. We are called to show leadership and lovingly guide others by example. 

One of the oracle cards pulled that I found particularly empowering depicted a warrior WOMAN. It is time to join together, rise up, and courageously stand up for marginalized groups, whether we are a part of those groups or not. 

Don't shut down and don't check out. While you may need to take a media break or set limits on your media consumption, don't stop reading the news. 

Don't turn away from reality.

Don't be afraid of intense feelings and allow yourself to feel them. However, try not to wallow in fear, letting it bog you down and cloud your mind.

You CAN be loving while also being assertive. Marianne Williamson explains this so beautifully.

We are here to be examples of peace and to bring forth love and compassion—even (and especially) to those we disagree with.

While it absolutely is time to step into our power and be firm in our convictions, we can only effectively do so from a place of love.

We cannot meet hate, anger and fear with more hate, anger and fear. Feel for everyone, including those we disagree with.

Pray for hearts to be opened...including our own.

Have faith. 

Have patience with yourself and others. Trust in this process, your higher power, and yourself.

Keep releasing fear and anger. There's much work to be done and we need to shine our brightest.

<3

November 2016: Love, Trust & Express Yourself

November shines a big, bright spotlight on YOU. This month is all about loving, accepting, trusting and expressing our authentic selves. And it calls for a heaping dose of self-care. The resounding message this month brings is: YES, your intuition is correct. Now, trust it and follow it!

The cycles of birth and death (quite fitting for Scorpio season)/beginnings and endings will be in focus. For some, this can mean literal births of children, pregnancies or important birthday celebrations. For many, this will mean the birthing of new projects or ways of being/relating to others. Conversely, November will also be a time of completions; as the new emerges, the old continues to fade away.

As always, don't expect these endings and beginnings to be neat and clear-cut. Many of us may find these transitions occurring in the opposite order we'd expect. The first half of the month looks like a stronger time for beginnings, while completions will be emphasized more in the later half...and don't be surprised if there's also a little of both going on at the same time.

Prepare for some positive (though not necessarily easy) shifts in our finances too. Many of us won't be able to deny it any longer—the time has come to get serious about freeing ourselves from the burden and habit of debt. Once we make the commitment to do so, we can trust that we'll be guided towards the best ways to reduce our debt and spending.

Overall, the first half of November will be a joyous, celebratory time—and the lighthearted energy will be more than welcome as the extremely intense, dark United States presidential election comes to a close. The forward motion of October will continue well into this month. It continues to be a time for forging ahead after our heart's desires. And, lucky for us, the steps we need to take will be crystal clear...so long as way pay attention to our inner guidance. 

Inspiration abound, the beginning and middle of the month will be perfect for expressing ourselves (creatively or otherwise). "Follow your bliss" will be an easier adage to live by than usual, so make the most of it! But remember, even amidst all the excitement, don't forget to take care of yourself.

As the moon wanes and we slip into winter, the final half of the month is a time for going within. Rest, retreat and some possible regrouping may be in order. While we should expect our sensitivity to be heightened all month, this will particularly true in the last half. Remember to honor and embrace your sensitivity as a precious part of who you are. Being intently present with our feelings and thoughts will help us to distinguish between what's ours and what we may be absorbing from others.

As a time of reflection and release, clearing rituals can be deeply healing (and likely necessary) during this period—clearing our own energy, as well as that of our homes and work spaces. Ask yourself, what do I need to let go of in order to better care for myself and closer align my life with what's most important to me? Be gentle, loving and honest with yourself. Many may come to the realization that we need help and will be called to face any fear or guilt we have about asking for it.

Honor your needs and be true to who you really are.

October 2016: Taking Heart & Pressing Forward

October will be a month of healing and forward motion. While the momentum has certainly increased, we may encounter some situations this month that appear to be challenges at first. But these seeming challenges will actually lead to deeper, more rapid inner healing. Family will be a central theme for many this month as well—visiting and spending time with family, welcoming new additions to the family, but also healing of deep-rooted issues related to family.

We are ready; the time has come for moving forward and getting out there. For most, this will mean venturing outside of our comfort zones. For some, this could mean literally traveling to a new destination where important growth and learning will take place. As always, faith and trust will be of paramount importance this month; trust that there are gifts hidden within challenges you may face, trust enough to let go of the need to control and predict outcomes, trust that you are on the right path and all is unfolding as it's meant to.

Health will be a major theme of October too. For many, emotional detoxification will also require physical detoxification. Eating more healthily (more fruits and vegetables, staying away from chemicals and processed foods, etc.), getting plenty of exercise and spending time in nature will be crucial for all of us this month. Get out there and enjoy the beautiful Autumn weather!

The forward momentum will be particularly strong in the first half of October, which is quite fitting as we make our way towards a full moon in the strong, assertive sign of Aries on October 16th. This is a time for taking action, making decisions and going for it. We're reminded that this is our life and it's up to us to take initiative and to set our own course. You know what you need and want to do, so do it! This will also be a time of heightened manifestation, so be extra careful of your thoughts and attitude—we have the power to create messes or masterpieces of our lives. We create the latter by staying centered in faith, gratitude and love. 

Circling back to the nature theme of this month, many will find flower essences particularly helpful in their healing work, such as lavender oil for relaxation or rose oil for heart opening. While still a strong time for taking action, the second half of October will have a noticeably gentler energy to it, where we'll be reaping benefits of what we sowed earlier in the month. For many, soulmate relationships will blossom or come into focus during this period as well.

Go fearlessly forward where you know you need to go, trusting in the divine guidance and protection that envelops you. 

September 2016: Embracing a New Chapter with an Open Heart

How can I bring blessings to others using my natural, unique talents and passions? This is the question to stay centered upon throughout September. From this heart center, we can then take loving, guided action towards our desires. The new moon in service-oriented Virgo on the very first day of this month (plus the sun in Virgo for most of the month) can really help us stay focused on how we can serve. The importance of keeping our hearts open and operating from a place of love can't be stressed enough this month. It's a great time to do some heart chakra-opening exercises, visualizations and meditations. 

Major transitions that got underway recently will continue to be in the foreground for quite some time to come. Moving on to a higher plateau may feel intimidating, but the universe continues to reassure us that we are ready. Open your heart to the abundance of encouraging energy this month offers, letting it pour over you.

This is birthing time for all things new. It's a time of breaking free from our old shells and moving forward to wonderful, new ways of being and living. While this is certainly an exciting time, change is almost always accompanied by fear, discomfort and sometimes even pain. Try to see any difficulties with these transitions as labor pains, which will be more than worth it when all is said and done.

We are being pushed to fully let go of old patterns that we know are holding us back. This will likely require forgiveness of ourselves and others. Energetic and physical detoxification may be necessary, particularly in the beginning of the month. 

Don't settle for negativity—negative people, situations, or, most importantly, your own personal attitude. It will be important to really pay attention to our thoughts and make sure they are aligned with love and peace, continually releasing all fear-based thoughts and feelings to the universe. Also be sure to pay attention to any recurrent thoughts or feelings, as these could very well be prompts to take steps in a certain direction. 

In order to remain in this state of awareness, it's essential to be grounded and centered in the present moment. But remember, beating yourself up is never the answer. Being patient with ourselves and taking good, loving care of ourselves is the only way to make lasting positive changes in our thinking and behavior.

The middle of the month will be a time of creativity, experimentation and collaboration, ushered in by the full moon in creative, free-flowing Pisces on the 16th. Try new experiences, venture outside of your comfort zone, and explore new ways of thinking and being—perhaps it may even be time to examine and reconsider some long-held beliefs or the current path you're on. This promises to be an enlightening, exciting time, so long as we approach the new with an open and curious mind. 

Many of us who are entrepreneurial-minded will see some real forward progress or experience epiphanies related to our current or future businesses this month. Again, the importance of acting from a place of loving service and abundance will come heavily into play. The universe reassures you that you have what it takes to make your dreams come true, there is no need to worry, and that you are worthy of all the wonderful gifts coming your way. Remember, accepting help and blessings isn't selfish or just about you—when you allow yourself to be helped, you can better help others.

Open your heart to joyfully giving and receiving wonderful new blessings. 

8/28/2016--9/4/2016: (Let) Go With the Flow

This week brings with a great deal of lovely, delightful energy. It's time to have some fun! And with the full moon in magical, mystical Pisces on Thursday, this will be a time of heightened synchronicity, so be sure to pay close attention to any "coincidences" or repetitive signs you're receiving. 

This week calls us to adopt a carefree, relaxed and accepting attitude. Many of us have been working hard (too hard, in fact) lately and it's time to set work aside and have some fun; treat yourself, spend time with friends and family, laugh, relax and just focus on enjoying yourself. You've earned it! In fact, most of us won't be able to afford not to take a break...unless we want to burn out. Plus, play awakens our creativity and allows us to return to our responsibilities with lifted energy and a renewed outlook. This is also a great time to explore new experiences, so keep an open mind and heart, and be willing to maybe even venture outside of your comfort zone. 

This week will be filled with hidden gems. Many of us will stumble upon blessings and pleasant surprises in unexpected places. They may show up in the form of money, opportunities, ideas, or more time. So again, pay attention and be willing to explore and experiment. And remember, gratitude ensures the continuous flow of abundance in our lives. 

While this can certainly be a time of fun and excitement, it's also crucial to continue consciously choosing to let go of the old that no longer serves us. The more we let go of the past, the more room we can make for the fresh, new energy available to us now. And good news: we don't need to strive, scheme or worry about how we'll let go. We must simply make the commitment to do so and then put our energy into having faith and praying for assistance when we need it. 

In fact, for many of us, the tendency to try to "make it happen" is a big part of what we're being called to release. We are asked to stay lovingly detached from our old situations and practice loving and accepting ourselves unconditionally. Only then can we extend that kind of love, acceptance and non-judgment to others.

8/21/2016--8/28/2016: Moving ON and UP with Love as Our Guide

It's time to level up. Things are lightening up and beautiful, higher frequency energy is readily accessible to us right now. In order to make the most of this energy and allow it to flow freely through us and transform us, some purification of thoughts, habits and even diet may be required. Trust that you ARE indeed ready to move to the next level, spiritually. 

There is an undeniable shift occurring. It's been in the works for some time and is primarily due to our willingness to open our hearts to love, healing and divine guidance. Certain people, places and activities that we used to be drawn to may no longer appeal to us. For some of us, this may mean making some difficult and even painful (but necessary) changes in our friendships and lifestyle. Trust that the universe is guiding you through these transitions. We are in a healing, shedding process. We let go of the old to make room for the new. 

We are indeed moving into a better place in our relationships, circumstances and lives in general, even if it may seem scary or uncomfortable right now. Since we're embarking on a new phase, getting clear on what we truly desire continues to be crucial. Romantic relationships will be spotlighted for many this week—what do you want for your love life? Whether single or attached, this is a good time to get clear on the answer to that question.  

This week, we are called to fully release any painful emotions and attachments that we're still hanging onto. Remember, attracting true love is an inside job; the most important relationship you have is the one with yourself. We must first feel loved and safe within before our relationships with others can flourish. Falling in love with life itself will naturally attract the kind of loving relationships we want. I know—sometimes the advice to "just fall in love with life" can sound like the epitome of "easier said than done." If this is the case, simply pray for help or set the intention to awaken this love within you.

You're ready to move forward onto better things—the waves of love and healing that are so readily available right now will help you.

8/14/2016-8/21/2016: Receiving Our Good

Open your arms wide because this week is all about receiving! :) And it's no coincidence this receptive theme corresponds with a full moon week, as full moons are optimal times, energetically, for reaping what we've sown and for manifestation. Tying back to the overall theme of this month, we are reminded to stay in the flow of giving and receiving; recognize if you've been giving a lot of yourself lately. If so (which is more than likely), accept this week's loving invitation to re-fill and receive. 

We must open up to accept gifts not only from the universe and other people, but from ourselves as well—it may be high time you reward yourself for all the hard work you've done. Some inner child and/or family issues spotlighted two weeks ago may resurface once again for additional healing; notice how your inner child comes alive and rejoices when you give yourself some loving attention and a much-deserved treat or two...or more :)

Let yourself receive without guilt or fear. The universe/your higher power wants to help you learn to create and accept abundance, especially if this is something that doesn't come easily to you. All you need to do is be willing to receive and to release fears of loss or lack (financially or otherwise). It's the perfect time to leap in and follow our heart's desires. And it can't be reiterated enough—don't let fear hold you back. Trust that following your heart will lead to more abundance in the long run, even if it means taking a brave leap of faith right now. 

But first, you may need to ask yourself—what is it that I truly want? Get clear on it. Meditate on it. Once we're clear about what our heart truly desires, we can dive in and embrace that vision. You have the power to write the script for your life—what kind of a life do you want? 

Know that you are deserving of all good.

8/7/2016-8/14/2016: Walking the Path of Least Resistance

It's been an intense few months and it's finally starting to feel like we're emerging "out of the woods." Although we're entering a lighter, more harmonious phase, we may need to hang on just a little while longer. As with this entire month, keeping the faith continues to be of special importance this week.

An abundance of creative inspiration is available for us so long as we remain anchored in a relaxed, receptive and trusting state. Dream big! And let go of any limiting beliefs you may have about yourself. The energy of the week is more conducive to dabbling and playing around with a few inspiring projects than it is to making a solid commitment to any one venture...yet. Loving, engaged detachment is the name of the game this week.

Although we're enjoying a gentler energy, we may still run into some struggles or be recovering from some lingering ones. But what may appear to be a problem right now is likely part of an answered prayer or intention. What appears to have been lost likely needed to fall away in order to be replaced by something better. Trust that the reasons behind your current situation will be revealed to you in due time—remember, hang in there a little while longer. 

This week reminds us to manifest our desires through the laws of least resistance and least effort—we do not need to push and force to make our dreams come true. All we need to do is have faith, listen to our inner guidance, and take action where we're guided. Deepak Chopra's teachings on the Law of Least Effort and the Law of Detachment may come in extra handy for some this week:

The Law of Least Effort
The Law of Detachment

These days, our thoughts seem to be manifesting faster than usual, so choose them wisely! Remember, our thoughts create our reality.

Take it easy and have faith.

August 2016: Staying in the Flow of Love & Trust

Many of us will start August on a hopeful, if not exciting, note, with new ideas or projects that we are excited to jump right into! And how fitting for the new moon in the exuberant sign of of Leo on Tuesday, August 2nd. One important thing to keep in mind is to make sure any action we take is from a mindset of abundance, rather than scarcity; in other words, from a place of love, rather than fear. Don't get sidetracked by worries about your life purpose or fixate on how you'll make money doing what you love. Instead, trust that the universe supports you fully. Ask, how can I serve? How can my natural talents and passions be used in the loving service of others? 

Being gentle with ourselves continues to be of particular importance these days. Take a moment to reflect—where have you been straining and striving? Where have you been harsh with yourself? This month invites us to prioritize self-love. It's time to make a commitment to see everything—ourselves, other people, all situations—through the lens of love. And in order to stay centered in love, we need to trust. We must trust that we, ourselves, are loved unconditionally and that all is happening for our highest good. We must trust that it is safe to love and to be loved. We must trust ourselves.

The interplay between action and rest, giving and receiving, contraction and expansion, will be at the forefront this month. It will be important to routinely check in with ourselves to discern what is being required of us in any given circumstance. If we're out of sync with "the flow," we'll know. We can count on resistance if we're swimming upstream.

There's the feeling that we're finally turning a corner, but the details of what's ahead aren't exactly clear yet. There may be a compulsion to rush ahead, taking action for action's sake. It’s important to distinguish between inspired action and compulsive action. Don’t be hasty—again, you can trust your intuition and your gut to let you know when it’s time to move forward.

The second half of August, in particular, will be a time for reaping what we have sown and collecting the fruits of our hard labor—so open your arms wide to receive, trusting that wonderful things are in store for you. In the coming days, connecting with nature and spending time outside will be especially restorative for us, so get out there as much as you can. It’s a great time to air things out—both literally and figuratively—clearing out the old to make room for the new and improved.

Stay in the flow of life.

7/31/2016-8/7/2016: Healing Our Inner Child

There is potential for great healing and breakthrough this week...if we are willing to do the inner work. It's a time to embrace and pour love over the child within, which Tuesday's new moon in Leo, a sign associated strongly with children, can help with. Please, be extra gentle with yourself; take good care of yourself and honor your needs. If you need to rest, rest. If you need to cry, cry. If you need to have some fun, do what you feel will bring you the most joy, without guilt or apology.

If we have any remaining mother or father issues, we can expect them to come to the surface for healing this week. This may require forgiveness or a willingness to let go of any negative energies relating to our parents. This doesn't have to be a daunting task—we must simply be willing to let go and give the situation to the universe for healing.

It's going to be especially important to stay grounded and present as well. Take it easy. Do one thing at a time. Breathe. We need to be gentle, but also honest with ourselves about what comes up this week—being present and grounded will help us to honestly face and accept what we see. We cannot let go of what we will not fully own. 

In conjunction with healing any mother or father issues we may still harbor, balancing our inner masculine and feminine will be another theme this week (and this entire month, for that matter). As we balance our feminine energy and/or heal any mother issues, we'll be better able to open up to and receive the universe's gifts. And as we balance our masculine energy and/or heal any father issues, life will be more generous to us, and we'll be better equipped to act on our inspirations and manifest our desires. 

In fact, at some point this week, many of us may find the timing to be perfect to finally take some serious strides towards our desires. But we must first be open, receptive and trusting—like a child—in order for these perfect opportunities to come about.

Love yourself into wholeness.

Breaking Free from Religion

For the past decade or so, I've been slowly but surely inching my way out of the tiny, suffocating box called organized religion—specifically Christianity, in my case.

Whether by nature or because of my religious upbringing—but most likely a mix of both—I've always been a spiritually inclined person. As a kid, I remember my mom (who had become a "Born-Again Christian" shortly after I was born) showing me how to invite the Holy Spirit into my heart through prayer.

I did as she instructed and then matter-of-factly told her something like, "It worked! I just felt Jesus hug my heart." And I wasn't lying. At that moment, I truly did feel a warm, divinely comforting presence swelling in my chest as though it were encasing my heart. I can still remember it. And it wouldn't be the last time I felt it. I went on for many years after that, happily and easily believing that there was a God who loved and looked after me, and that he was the Christian God, because my family and church told me he was.

The first time I can remember starting to seriously question my faith was when I stumbled across a book my mom's friend had lent her, when I was about 12 or so. It was nauseatingly titled something to the effect of, The Submissive Wife. Curious what "submissive" even meant, I flipped through the pages and read, with confusion that quickly turned to disgust, a woman giving other women advice on how to be more "obedient" to their husbands, supporting her assertions with Bible passages. I went on to read the author applaud a woman for "saving" her marriage to a man she found out was molesting their 13-year-old daughter. This was supposed to be an example of a success story—a marriage that prevailed even through the greatest hardship.

I vividly remember getting so angry that I literally hurled the book against the wall.

Who is the God this brainwashed, self-hating idiot is talking about? Certainly not the God I know...or thought I knew? Am I worth inherently less and meant to be subservient to men just because I'm a girl? This can't be true! This goes against everything I think and feel! I can't accept this! But...will I go to hell if I don't? 

Practically panicked, I brought these concerns to my mom, hoping for her to say something reassuring like, "This book belongs in the trash. That's just a sad, sick woman. That's not who God is and that's not what Christianity is about." After all, my mom certainly didn't appear to abide by the sickening principles that this book (and, apparently, the Bible) promoted, in her marriage to my dad.

But there was no reassurance to be had. My mom was searching and confused herself, trying to find her own way. And though she conceded that the "success story" about the "godly wife" staying with her daughter-raping husband was despicably wrong, I watched her do mental gymnastics to try and soften the other less shocking (but still deplorable) things the author said, attempting to make them sound less ridiculous and derogatory than they actually were. She tried to wrap the author's cited Bible verses around hypothetical examples that simply didn't fit or only magnified the absurdity.

I could see that she was squelching her own logic and intuition for the sake of trying to make a specific Bible passage applicable to the life of any sane and decent person. To avoid disregarding the verse altogether (gasp!), she instead concocted a bunch of euphemistic "what-that's-really-trying-to-says." This was the same kind of (lack of) logic I would go on to see people at church employing constantly—well-intentioned people, anyway. Of course, every so often, you'd run into the hateful lunatic that actually stood by literal biblical interpretations—but to their credit, at least they were consistent. Anyway, after talking to my mom, I felt even more bitterly frustrated and hopelessly confused than before. 

My struggle with the sexism I saw in Christianity—which became increasingly blaring when my mom transferred us from a run-of-the-mill catholic church to an evangelical, born-again church—plagued me for years. And it served as a spring board, off of which many more grievances would form—thank God (no pun intended...well maybe). As I got older and started to explore this book called the Bible for myself, I quickly realized it could not be taken literally. Not by any sane person, anyway. 

...So, if the Bible can't be taken literally (seeing as it blatantly condones slavery and murder), why should anyone go along with all of the sexist, limiting stuff it says about women?

...Or any of this outdated stuff about staying "pure" until marriage, and being so ashamed and repressed when it comes to sexuality?

I managed to cling to my "Christian" identity for many, many years, despite the constant dissonance, discomfort and confusion I lived with. But these uncomfortable feelings only grew and became harder to live with as time went on. I watched the marriages of youth group and church leaders, who had preached the importance of chastity and family values, fall apart. I watched the lives of people who were "on fire for God"—which simply meant they fiercely despised and denied their humanity, regarding themselves and all of us as wretched, sinful creatures by nature, who could only be saved by the grace of God—completely crumble.

More and more, I saw these so-called "godly" people make hypocritical fools of themselves, revealing how truly lost and unhappy they were deep down. In a way it was very sad, but in another, I must admit that it was somewhat (perhaps sickly) satisfying and vindicating. Maybe I wasn't just a "bad Christian" for questioning these people so much and being unable to completely buy what they were selling. Maybe there was something to my growing skepticism.

I often listened to Christian leaders say that as Christians, we were supposed to be "beacons of light" that would convert others simply because they would be so drawn to us and want to be like us. The problem was, I couldn't find a single Christian that I actually wanted to be like. Not one. And the people I watched get "drawn in" were often the most hurt, desperate and confused kinds of people I had ever encountered. It made me uncomfortable. Unwittingly (to give the benefit of the doubt), it seemed the church took advantage of their confusion and seeking—of our confusion and seeking. Come and trade one delusion for another.

Eventually, my questioning evolved to, why should I believe that all homosexuals are "living in sin" simply because the Bible says so?

Then (much later), why should I believe that I am inherently a wicked sinner in need of saving simply because the Bible says I am?

The slippery slope of questioning is exactly what many church leaders are most terrified of. And it was my path to freedom—and authentic spiritual awakening.

Finally, I arrived upon, why should I believe Christianity is the only way to God simply because the Bible says so?

I'm finding that the more I let go of the concepts that organized religion pushed on me for all those years (trust me, I'm still in the process), the better and better I feel. I've never felt more spiritually connected to God/the Universe/whatever-you-want-to-call-it (it's nice to no longer have an obsessive need to define what that is :p) than I do right now. And I can't remember the last time I went to church. Honestly, I've never been as happy as I am right now.

I'm learning to love life. I'm learning to love and embrace the unknown, rather than be terrified of it. Most importantly, I'm learning to love and trust myself. In my opinion, one of the most dangerous things organized religion does is it tells us that we CANNOT trust ourselves. You need the Bible to tell you what to do, you need some guy called a pastor or priest to tell you what to do. After all, you are a sinner by nature; your thoughts, feelings and impulses cannot, under any circumstance, be trusted. You are the enemy.

The fact that so many people still operate under this belief system breaks my heart. It's such a dreary, deluded, fear-based way to live—I know because I was once there. And I can't even begin to explain how happy I am to be away from that place now. I have no idea what's next—not when I die, not tomorrow, not even a minute from now, for that matter. But I'm perfectly happy with that. 

Reminders for the Creative Soul

(Also appearing on Rebelle Society)

Some of us are called to live lives of creativity and unconventionality - you know who you are. I sometimes wonder if all, not just some, of us are meant to live such lives (which would mean, in an ideal world, there would be no such thing as "conventionality"), but most people ignore the call and instead live muted, dulled versions of what their lives could have been for the sake of convenience, comfort, stability and/or money. I don't know.

Either way - if you hear the call, don't ignore it.

As I'm sure everyone can relate to, one of the most tragic parts about growing into adulthood was how the pressures of the "real world" slowly but surely buried and stifled the wild, free imagination that was mine in childhood. I never lost it completely; it just went into dormancy.

I am only now just beginning to unbury that creative essence. Recently, my sleepy but awakening inner child gifted me with a sudden, brief flash of clarity that I felt compelled to write down as something to remind myself of whenever I get bogged down with the kinds of things that put my inner child to sleep in the first place. And hopefully, these reminders can also be helpful to any kindred spirits out there :)


Throw positive, inspired action in the direction of your dreams.
But don't obsess over what that action "should" be. One of my dreams is to be an author. And right now, I have a specific book that I intend to write, but I sometimes hit a wall when brainstorming. Or I just don't feel inspired to brainstorm at all. But I should force myself to keep brainstorming, right? My intention is to create a storyline for this book, so my action should be to brainstorm ideas and figure the damn thing out already.

This kind of thinking usually precedes the good old spiral of negativity, which typically goes something like this: UGH. I can't believe how long this is taking me. Why can't I think of anything good? Whatever, I'm going on facebook now.


Sometimes it's better to take a step back and look at the bigger picture, especially when you're stuck on details. For example, instead of "I want to be an author of this specific book," I've been trying ,"I want to be a writer," and then just start writing - whatever I feel like writing at the moment. Anything. Trust that taking broader action can and will spill over into your specific goals.


Stop judging yourself and being scared to make mistakes.
And just create. Ideally, creating should be something that's carefree, flowing and fun - just like it was when you were a kid. Judging yourself not only sucks all the fun out of it, but stifles (and sometimes even kills) the entire process. Don't be afraid of "bad" ideas.

"There is no innovation and creativity without failure. Period." - Brene Brown

Failure is inevitable. I find that I usually have to come up with at least a hundred "bad" ideas before finally stumbling across a "good" one. I also recently noticed that I often turn taking action towards my dreams into a grueling, exhausting ordeal, with all of my critical, negative self-talk. Upon finally realizing this, it hit me...why should I be anything but positive and overflowing with love and patience for myself, especially when taking the time to follow after my dreams?

But in order to do any of this, it's essential to...

Trust yourself.
Trust that you are creative. Trust that you can trust yourself, even after you fail. Trust that everything you need to fulfill your dreams is already within you now.

Get comfortable with discomfort
...And with the fact that you probably never will. Putting yourself out there is uncomfortable, failure is uncomfortable. As with so many things in life, I believe involved detachment is key; remember and stay open to the infinite possibilities available to you. Don't be afraid to pour your time and energy into creating an entire world, only to have to demolish and re-build it from scratch. It's all meant to be.

Embrace the messiness.
As a bit of an organization- and control-freak, I'm learning that I need to stop trying fit everything I do into a neat little category. I need to let go of the compulsion to have everything outlined, listed and planned out - this mindset simply isn't compatible with creativity, which is often sporadic, bursting and nonlinear.

Stop waiting around for the "perfect time."
Because it will never come. It is now. Don't wait around for inspiration - sure, there are those wonderful, effortless times when she will pay me a surprise visit, but I find she usually prefers to meet me halfway.

Vibrate at the level of  your dreams.
Act as though your dreams are already yours. It's no mystery that we attract what we emit - live from a place of belief that your dreams are already as good as realized (while, of course, taking action towards them) and they will manifest faster. I find the principle of Acting As If to be tremendously helpful when it comes to this.

Stop worrying about how to make money from what you're creating.
What more could anyone want than to make a living doing what they love? It's ok to acknowledge that this is your end hope, but don't focus too much on monetization; it will only side-track you and may cheapen your creation. All that matters is going in the direction of your passion. Trust that all material needs will naturally follow in right timing.

You don't have to have just one purpose.
You may have one primary passion that trumps all others. Or you may have several, or even a dozen, things you're passionate about. Or you may have a number of interests, but aren't even sure what you're passionate about yet. Your passions may remain constant throughout your life, or they could change completely, numerous times. Don't feel like you have to choose just one "calling."

Plan - optional.
I've heard many times that the intentions we set must be clear ones. But I haven't found this to be necessarily true for me. Yes, the clearer the intention, the better - usually. However, if your heart is being pulled strongly in a certain direction, but you're not sure exactly what that means (ex: I feel compelled to develop my intuitive abilities, but I don't know to what end or for what purpose), you don't necessarily have to wait around for a clear goal to form. Set an open-ended intention, take positive action in the direction you're being pulled, and trust the specifics will form as you go.

The creative adult is the child who survived after the world tried killing them, making them 'grown up.' The creative adult is the child who survived the blandness of schooling, the unhelpful words of bad teachers, and the nay-saying ways of the world. The creative adult is in essence simply that, a child."

- Ursula K. Le Guin

In An Octopus's Garden in the Shade

(Also appearing on Rebelle Society)



I woke up this morning with Octopus’s Garden by The Beatles in my head.

Not for any apparent reason either – I can’t remember the last time I actually heard that (wonderful, whimsical) song. Anyway, since this isn’t the first time in the past (quite stressful) week or so that Octopus’s Garden has been randomly stuck in my head, I decided to look up the lyrics.

I’m of the belief that if a song pops into your head out of nowhere, there’s a good chance the universe (or at least your subconscious) is trying to tell you something, so I was hoping that perhaps the universe had a message for me hidden in an Octopus’s Garden.

Skimming through the lyrics, one of the lines that struck me the most was:

We would be warm below the storm
In our little hideaway beneath the waves

Reading these words, I instantly recalled listening to a man named Bob Roth discuss transcendental meditation just a few days before, likening our racing minds to 40-foot waves in the ocean – no matter how turbulent the ocean's surface may be, at its core depths it is always quiet and still, he said. He then drew the parallel that just as the ocean's floor is naturally peaceful no matter how wild the surface may be, our true essence is naturally peaceful no matter how loud and incessant our minds may be.

I was gently reminded that my true essence could be my "little hideaway beneath the waves" of my mind and circumstances. I just had to reconnect to that natural essence.

What the universe has been continuously telling me in the midst of my recent worries about money, my future, blahblahblah, is to quit stressing and to simply trust. Grateful as I've been for the encouragement, I realize I haven't allowed myself the joy of letting that message fully sink in; I "know" that I "should" stop worrying and have faith that everything will work out, but I just haven't seemed to be able to walk in that knowing lately.

The message contained in this seemingly silly song was just what I needed to help me get a little closer to fully embracing that truth. It served to me as a reminder to trust that I am loved, safe and that all my needs will be met. To focus on the loveliness, silliness and magic of life. To relax, have fun and not take life so seriously.

Unsurprisingly, I've found the "stop worrying and just trust" advice to be much easier said than done – it takes bravery to have faith. Ironic as it is, I’ve found that it takes hard work and self-discipline to be carefree (especially if you happen to be an anxiety-prone person like I am).

Choosing peace and love over anxiety and fear is just that – a choice. And though it may be easier to default to autopilot, fight-or-flight mode, I’ve discovered that choosing misery ultimately uses up at least as much energy as choosing joy does. Learning to consciously make the right choice is a long process – a process that can't possibly involve too much self-love and patience.

Octopus’s Garden ends with what seemed, as I read it, to be an invitation so warm that I nearly teared up:

We would be so happy you and me…
I'd like to be under the sea
In an octopus's garden with you

An Introduction to the Seven Chakras

(Source)

The chakras represent the seven major energy centers of our bodies. Learning about the chakras has helped me tremendously in better understanding the concept of inner balance and myself as a whole. Blockages in the chakras can cause mental, emotional and spiritual problems, which is why it's important to keep energy flowing freely between them. Here's an introduction to each of the chakras and which areas they govern:

1st Chakra – Root (Muladhara)

Location: Base of spine

Color: Red

Associated primarily with: basic survival needs such as security, safety, belonging, and sex (particularly for males), as well as grounding

Balancing Affirmations:
"I am safe and I trust that all of my needs will be taken care of."
"I am meant to be here now; I am firmly rooted in the present moment."

2nd Chakra - Sacral (Swadhisthana)

Location: Below navel

Color: Orange

Associated primarily with: emotions, creativity, birth, self-worth, intuition, friendliness, and sex (particularly for females)

Balancing Affirmations:

"I embrace my feelings and am in touch with my creativity."

"I easily accept and am fully deserving of pleasure and joy."

3rd Chakra – Solar Plexus (Manipura)

Location: Above the navel and below the rib-cage

Color: Yellow

Associated primarily with: personal power, manifesting, confidence, willpower, "gut" feelings, psychic development, anger, strength, and passions

Balancing Affirmations:
"I trust in myself."
"I am the powerful creator of my own life. I manifest my desires easily."

4th Chakra - Heart (Anahata)

Location: Heart

Color: Green

Associated primarily with: compassion, love for others and self, connection with others, spirituality, giving and receiving

Balancing Affirmations:

"I love and accept myself. Love is my essence."

"I am overflowing with love and compassion for others."

"I effortlessly give and receive love."

5th Chakra - Throat (Vishuddha)

Location: Neck/throat

Color: Blue

Associated primarily with: communication, expression, honesty, creativity, and transformation

Balancing Affirmations:

"I express myself easily, with honesty, love and clarity."

6th Chakra - Third-Eye (Ajna)

Location: Middle of forehead, in between the eyebrows

Color: Indigo

Associated primarily with: intuition, psychic ability/sixth sense, higher self, selflessness, and detachment

Balancing Affirmations:

"I am completely in tune with my intuition. I trust my intuition."

"I see clearly into both the physical and psychic realm, and am under the protection of the divine."

7th Chakra - Crown (Sahasrara)

Location: Top of the head

Color: Light purple

Associated primarily with: connection to the divine, spirituality, enlightenment, wisdom, and higher consciousness

Balancing Affirmations:

"I am connected to and guided by the divine."

"I am pure love and light."

Another great chakra-balancing exercise is visualization. For example, when I'm feeling anxious about something, I'll visualize a bright, red wheel spinning freely at the base of my spine. For overall balancing, it's a good idea (ideally during meditation) to visualize each chakra color one by one as freely spinning wheels while bringing your attention to the associated body part.

The Meaning of Repeating Numbers

I don’t believe there’s any such thing as coincidences. When we experience synchronicity, the universe is trying to get our attention -- whether that means to guide us in a certain direction or simply give us an encouraging nudge that we’re on the right path.

Regardless of whether or not I understand what a synchronous occurrence means when it happens, I always make a point to consciously acknowledge it and thank my higher power for reaching out. One of the many ways that synchronicity may show up is through repeating numbers. For me, it’s also one of the most common; in fact, it's happened to me twice in the past two days (1111 and 698).

I absolutely love and am so thankful for the below blog, Angel Numbers. It’s the best resource I’ve come across for decoding what number-related synchronicities might mean:

ANGEL NUMBERS - Joanne Sacred Scribes

Enjoy! :)